When a storm hits...and your left with the pieces

Thinking about why we Americans have a hard time dealing with death, grief, despair, disappointment and sadness - we try to avoid it at all costs. We even put on a facade like everything is OK. I give it this analogy:
We're strolling along in life. Life is good. Family, the job, relationships, health -all is good and THEN, Katrina stikes!!! What do we do now? The pieces of life are scattered about and our path is forever changed. Relationships we once had are not there anymore. Why is that? I mean, don't get me wrong we are still cordial to one another but those relationships, that intimacy that we once shared has been damaged.

Many relationships are built around hobbies, work, going to the same church, interests, clubs, sporting events etc and not fully on eternal things. When those things are stripped away as in my case it reveals what the relationships were really built on. Time has proven to me that many people(myself included prior to ALS) are too busy with their hobbies, work, interests, sporting events, church activities which are all really good things and important but from somebody who is handicapped and not able to do those things anymore, you feel left out and abandoned and even forgotten about at times.

Some people have a hard time knowing what to do or say because they have a hard time dealing with despair, disapointment, sadness, grief, and death. A friend of mine once said that maybe its like they are mourning the loss of you, even though you have not died. So they are keeping you at a distance so they won't hurt even more when you actually do pass. How sad.

Maybe some people feel like I am not approachable now. I want to appologize if I have every made anyone feel that way, I hope people dont take it personally. There are a lot of adjustments that come now with living with a terminal disease. If you're reading this and we shared life together, know that I valued that time that our paths crossed. Its ok to talk about "the disease" or even "death". I know it is not a favorite subject of many people, but when I think about death and dying I think about spending eternity with God my father and Jesus in their infinite glory and holiness. There is no sadness or grief in heaven. There is no despair or anxiety, everything is perfect and as God planned.

When I leave this earth, my hope is that I have made a lasting mark on society, that people would remember me for the legacy that I have left behind. That people would say "yeah that Eric Fox guy, he sure loved Jesus. He was the real deal." That if our paths did cross, that you would have pleasant memories of our time together. But until that time God has me busy doing his good work, sharing my testimony and sharing the good news with all that will listen. I will be doing that until I take my last breath on this earth. "I want to run the race in such a way as to win the prize for which Jesus Christ has called me heavenwardly" so that when I get to the end and see Jesus face to face he will say, "Well done, my good and faithful servant."

Thanks for listening to me banter on. Whatever reason God had me write this hopefully it helps you understand how I'm feeling.

Eric